For gay singles, the question comes up often: “Where can I go to find gay men near me?” Queer men make up less than 10% of the global population, although that number differs depending on the study. In the U.S., only about 1.7% of men identify as strictly gay, so single gay men definitely face some challenges in finding local partners.

A gay man living in a major city may be able to find LGBTQ+ date prospects a little more easily because the population is so big. It’s especially difficult for a gay person living in a small town or a rural area to safely meet and date or hook up with another man.

All in all, it can be like trying to find a rainbow needle in the proverbial haystack. The good news is that with the rise of LGBTQ+ representation, more options exist for queer men to find each other and explore relationships, dating, and casual encounters.

1. Online Dating Sites

Online dating sites and dating apps continue to gain popularity as people spend more of their time online and on their phones. The market for digital dating options is expanding, and that means single gay men can easily find local matches through an online dating site or app while going about their daily lives.

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★★★★★ 4.9/5.0
  • Proud ally to the LGBTQ community
  • Millions of verified dating profiles to browse for free
  • Over 20 years’ worth of success stories

While Match isn’t a gay dating site itself, it does offer options for gay men looking to date, as opposed to just hooking up. The dating site and app allow you to create a profile for free, and search for singles in your area, based on the factors that make for long-term, strong connections. With over 25 years of experience, Match.com has worked hard to build and maintain a reputation in the crowded dating site field.

For a gay man, Match offers substantial benefits: safety, verified profiles, and custom-tailored filters to allow you to find exactly the right kind of men in your area. Match takes pride in its status as an ally to the LGBTQ+ community, and its premium membership features make it even easier to find hot gay men and get to know them better.

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★★★★★ 4.7/5.0
  • Has search options for same-sex relationships
  • An 80-question personality test available for free
  • Paid features include unlimited live messaging and video chat

While Match users may be looking for something casual or serious, eharmony users seek out exclusively serious relationships. The site is not specifically for gay dating, but for gay single men looking to eventually get married, eharmony still represents a major resource for finding a partner.

Among the wide variety of dating sites, eharmony sets itself apart by marketing exclusively to people who want to find a partner to marry, not just date or hook up. If you’re a gay man looking for a future husband, eharmony wants to help with tools that range from the compatibility quiz to matches sent straight to your inbox. You can browse profiles for free, and take a look at the gay men near you, but there are definite benefits to your paid subscription, like being able to contact anyone you find.

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★★★★ 4.1/5.0
  • Free registration and unlimited profile browsing
  • Add online crushes to the Hotlist or My Network
  • Enjoy private conversations in the Message Center

If you’re looking for a gay hookup, MenNation is on your side. The site sets the tone right off the bat, with erotic content front and center. Gay single men and couples alike are welcome, and profiles contain spicy erotica and intriguing photos and video as a preview of coming attractions.

The gay hookup site doesn’t care about your specific sexual orientation, just that you’re a man seeking another man (or other men) for a good time. You can keep a low profile or go all out, however you’re most comfortable. While free members can browse profiles and send flirts, you need a paid membership to access the full contact features the gay hookup website offers.

2. Swiping Apps

If you don’t want to invest lots of time in getting to know a gay guy online before meeting up, swiping apps make it easy to find lots of potential matches and act on them. Tinder may be the benchmark, but many apps continue to come onto the market, targeting specifically gay men who want to look before they leap — but not too long.

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★★★★ 4.1/5.0
  • Among the most popular gay social networks in the world
  • Men connect via private and group chats
  • View nearby profiles using real-time GPS data

Grindr hit app stores in 2009, and the gay dating app has made its reputation as one of the premier venues for meeting gay men. Whether you’re gay, bisexual, pansexual, cisgender or transgender, you can use this platform to enjoy casual encounters with Grindr users.

Grindr welcomes queer men who want to meet other men for casual sex, serious relationships, and everything in between.

As one of the first swiping apps that caters to the gay community, Grindr has had a lot of time to refine and develop features that serve the interests of hot gay men. Grindr users with a free account can swipe on local dating profiles as much as they want. The gay dating app serves up gay singles based on GPS information. Grindr Xtra gives you the ability to swipe outside of your area, and boost your daily quota of likes, which can come in handy.

Scruff

While Scruff hasn’t been around as long as Grindr, it sets itself apart by catering to the less-represented members of the gay community. Scruff is also a pioneer in travel dating for gay men, offering options to announce travel plans so you can begin to find matches in another town before you even arrive. 

Scruff provides lots of search filters to make it easy for you to find the exact type of man for your tastes, even before you start swiping. The app also offers access to events for the LGBTQ+ community, in case you want a low-key, low-pressure first meeting.  Free membership lets you browse, “woof” at profiles, and offers some limited contact options, but paid membership opens things up a lot more.

3. Gay Chat Rooms

A chat room can offer a low-stakes environment to get to know people without specific expectations. Gay chat rooms make it easy to explore and meet a lot of people at once without the pressures that come with a conventional dating site or gay bar. 

FreeChatNow

It may surprise some younger singles to know that many of the most successful dating sites and even a few apps have roots in the 1990s. FreeChatNow offers singles the chance to meet and mingle without leaving the comfort of their own homes. The site offers niche chat rooms as well, including chat room options for gay men.

321Chat

Similarly, 321Chat is another anonymous chat site that offers customizations to make it easy to find exactly the right audience, and it has all the flavor of old-school chat rooms. The minimalistic design and the option to chat as a guest mean that any gay man can connect with local singles in a safe environment that keeps the connection at the forefront.

4. Local Personal Ads

Personal ads have been around a long time, and taking things online doesn’t mean you can’t stay local. Online personals give you a chance to search more broadly, while staying in the right zip code, helping you find another gay guy to hook up with or to date more seriously.

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★★★★ 3.9/5.0

FriendFinder-X is not specifically for the gay community, but it does provide a venue for gay men to seek out local connections. While signup is free, Gold Membership provides a lot of benefits when it comes to contacting the matches you find. The X-rated community puts hookups right up front, but it’s still possible to find something deeper if that’s what you’re looking for.

Doublelist

Doublelist rose from the ashes of BackPage and other sites shuttered by FOSTA and SESTA to provide the same simple access to personal ads without the specter of drug deals and sex trafficking. The site double-verifies its users, so you can find casual sex, dating, and even more serious relationship opportunities without fear.

5. Pride Events

Whether you’re looking for a new gay friend or a lesbian woman to help you navigate your city’s local scene, Pride events provide a lot of opportunities to connect and network. Pride events can also help you find local singles to date, for casual hookups, and more. If you’re not ready to come out of the closet, you can still go to public events and see what the gay community in your area is like.

6. Interest-Based Meetups

If you want to forge a more lasting connection with someone, sharing common interests is a major factor. That makes interest-based meetups an ideal choice for finding local gay men to date or hook up with. The internet has made it easier than ever to find, register for, and even attend meetups online or in person. All it takes is a little research on Meetup.com, Eventbrite, or another community source, and you can indulge a hobby while finding prospective matches.

7. Night Clubs & Gay Bars

While interest-based meetups make it easy to meet people, you will likely encounter more straight men than queer men just as a matter of statistics. At a gay bar and at nightclubs that cater to the gay community, you’re more likely to find local singles who share your sexual orientation.

While gay clubs of the past specialized in loud music and lots of booze, the expanding market means you have options for encounters that are a little more refined, or a little more relaxed and quiet, which is great for any queer person who doesn’t like the noise.

8. Volunteerism

Getting involved in giving back to your community can be a great way to meet someone who shares your passions. You may just meet a straight guy or two for friendship, but volunteerism still opens up opportunities for romance. One way to tip the odds in your favor is to focus your efforts on charities and organizations that represent the gay community and the LGBTQ+ community more broadly. 

FAQs: Is Grindr Only Used for Hookups?

Despite its reputation, Grindr is good for more than just a gay hookup app. Many Grindr users have found a gay friend or long-term relationship as well as the opportunity for a casual encounter on the online dating app. Finding something more serious or more platonic may not be as common, but it does occur.

Where Can I Meet a Wealthy Sugar Daddy?

Queer men looking for a wealthy patron or sugar daddy have fewer options than do straight women in similar situations, but there are dating sites out there to serve that need. Two sites in particular make decent hunting grounds for a would-be sugar baby to find wealthy gay single men, especially if you’re looking for an older man.

Seeking.com has been around for over a decade, previously under the name Seeking Arrangement. The site isn’t specifically for queer men, or even for queer people in general, but some wealthy men on the site may be looking specifically for single gay men to “sponsor.” 

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★★★★★ 4.7/5.0

Elite Singles is a little different in that it doesn’t specifically cater to sugar dating or mutually beneficial relationships. However, Elite Singles features many wealthy men, some of whom are seeking other successful, educated gay men. 

Do Gay Dating Apps Have Filters for Sexual Orientation?

Some dating apps do offer filters for sexual orientation, recognizing that some gay men prefer to avoid bisexual men or other queer men. 

However, it’s not a common feature to find in a gay dating app. Most gay dating and gay sex apps simply ask you to identify your gender and who you want to date, so it’s not a question of your specific orientation. Internalized homophobia and concerns for masculinity can lead to men who identify as straight but who want to be with another man, and many dating sites and apps work with this.

Where Can I Go to Meet Hot Single Guys Tonight?

We’ve listed several options for a guy to find his fair share of hot gay men locally, but if you want to find a casual hookup as quickly as possible, there are a few dating apps that speed the process up even more.

Grindr is a well-known option for any gay guy looking to find a hookup. While you can find something more serious, or even just make friends on the platform, the app excels at making it easy to arrange a hookup. You can find someone in your area quickly whether you can host the meeting or need your prospective casual encounter to host it.

Screenshot of Grindr's website
Grindr provides location-based matches for men seeking men.

Tinder is not exclusively for gay men, but we still rank it among the top gay hookup apps on the market. Plenty of gay singles use the app to help find local connections. Tinder has been around for a decade now, and has a reputation for helping its users get down to business quickly by swiping, finding mutual matches, and messaging. 

DOWN is another app that serves everyone, not just the gay community. However, DOWN is a dating app specifically and openly in favor of hookups, rather than anything more serious. The app encourages its user base to connect quickly and make plans in as little time as possible, without the need to pretend to look for more.

Get Creative & Be Bold to Find Gay Men Nearby

Single gay men looking to find partners nearby need to be creative and bold. Whether you’re in a major city or a rural town, you may find yourself asking, “How can I find gay men near me?” and there are likely more options than you think.

You have several ways to meet local gay men and maybe even the man of your dreams whether you decide to swipe on an app or dating site or go to a gay bar or LGBTQ+ event in person to meet new people. Even if you just want to meet the best man of the week, you can track him down in your area with a little bit of knowledge and the right approach.

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