You don’t have to look far to see the lingering stigma around the idea of open relationships. In fact, Reddit and other forums are full of posts reinforcing the idea that maintaining an open relationship is nothing more than a recipe for jealousy and heartbreak.

Fortunately, the tide is turning in a poly direction, especially among today’s youth. We’ve seen growing acceptance of ethical non-monogamy in polls and studies like this YouGov survey.

Nowadays more people open to the idea of exploring outside of monogamous relationships, it should come as no surprise that a growing number of dating sites and apps cater to couples and polyamorous groups. These open relationship dating sites take the stigma out of indulging your curiosity, and make it easy to find additional partners and make new connections, even though you’re already in a relationship.

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★★★★★ 4.8/5.0
  • Discreetly arranges one-night stands and extramarital affairs
  • More than 80 million profiles worldwide
  • Travel-friendly features for seeking matches in other cities

Ashley Madison is known as an affair site, but it’s also a common choice for married people in open relationships. For one thing, the majority of Ashley Madison members are married, so there is pretty much zero risk of encountering a negative reaction about dating or hooking up while married on the platform.

Ashley Madison provides members with plenty of tools to keep their dating lives discreet, whether you’re seeking an affair or keeping your relationship open. Photo blurring and anonymity audits reduce the risk of a friend or acquaintance finding you on the site or app, and a password-protected photo vault gives you the power to show yourself off to the people you trust. And if you are on the down low, the panic button will instantly navigate you away from Ashley Madison if you need to make a quick escape. 

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★★★★★ 4.8/5.0
  • A global network of naughty singles over 18
  • Ability to blur nude and explicit content, if desired
  • Advanced search filters and one-on-one messaging

The no-judgment atmosphere on BeNaughty extends in every direction, so it’s not surprising that the casual dating site allows couples as well as singles to join. Swingers may be disappointed that BeNaughty doesn’t allow them to sign up for a couples account, but its moderators won’t boot a couple for sharing an account. You and your partner can sign up individually, and pursue anyone you want on the platform.

BeNaughty isn’t for shrinking violets. Its naughty dating scene appeals to confident people who know what they want and aren’t afraid to flaunt what they’ve got. You’ll find adult content everywhere on the platform, and you can add to the erotica with your own revealing photos.

Our dating experts recommend straight couples choose the female gender option when creating an account. Women on BeNaughty only need to upload a photo to their profile, and they can access chat features for free. Men on BeNaughty must pay for one of the premium subscription packages to get the same access.

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★★★★★ 4.7/5.0

Adult Friend Finder is a top choice for swingers, polyamorous people, and couples in open relationships. The adult dating site welcomes couples to join the sexy fun online. Poly groups can even link up to plan and execute erotic adventures together. Whether you’re looking for a third person to join you in the bedroom, a casual hookup outside of your marriage, or an orgy on your own terms, the judgment-free atmosphere on AFF makes it easy to jump in and express your desires.

Adult Friend Finder provides plenty of tools to keep your search for new explicit experiences discreet. You can browse users in your area in complete anonymity, and premium users can access incognito mode for another layer of protection. You can keep your identity masked in your dating profile and your profile picture.

As a basic member on AFF, you can access public areas of the site (chat rooms and forums), but you’ll need a premium membership to send private messages.

4. Zoosk

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★★★★ 3.8/5.0
  • Fast-paced dating scene available in 80 countries
  • Full members can send unlimited messages
  • Advanced search filters help you zero in on the hottest dates

Although Zoosk doesn’t cater to couples explicitly, the mainstream dating platform offers a lot of interesting perks and features that make it a popular choice among polyamorous people. The dating site and app can optimized video features through the Great Dates option, which lets you and a potential partner go on a virtual date to an exotic location. The dating website also has livesteam options for broadcasting to multiple prospective partners at once.

Zoosk is a popular choice for people in open relationships because of the flexibility the platform offers. The site and app operate on a freemium model, with limited communications options for basic membership and expanded tools for premium subscribers. If you don’t want to commit to a monthly fee, you can select the specific perks you want by buying Zoosk Coins and paying for individual uses of certain features.

5. Feeld

Plenty of dating sites and apps allow couples in open relationships to join, but Feeld stands apart as one of the earliest dating apps to cater to polyamorous people. CEO Dimo Trifonov created the app as a love letter to his partner, Ana Kirova, to express his acceptance of her polyamorous needs in their relationship.

Because it’s explicitly for polyamorous people, Feeld offers features that more mainstream dating platforms tend to leave off.

Feeld screenshot
Feeld empowers queer and polyamorous individuals to find romance.

You can join Feeld as a couple or as a single person, and you can have separate accounts with your partner that are linked for easier wooing of potential partners.

Feeld offers an exhaustive list of options for sexual orientation and gender identity, so queer, poly, and all sorts of folks can find a match. Group chats help coordinate multiple partners and keep communication all in one place. These unique tools come baked into the app’s free membership, so there’s no need for a premium membership to access them.

6. OkCupid

OkCupid is a mainstream dating site and app that adheres to core principles of inclusion. The app has become wildly popular for swingers and polyamorous people. Despite changes at the helm over the years, the online dating service has kept every core feature free, and the site encourages an inclusive and non-judgmental atmosphere.

OkCupid logo
The OkCupid team boasts creating over 91 million connections each year.

OkCupid’s unlimited free messaging makes it an easy choice for single people who want to expand their romantic options. What’s more, OkCupid provides simple ways to identify yourself as polyamorous, including linking back to your partner’s profile and adding tags for your own profile. Best of all, you get access to these tools without ever taking out your credit card.

7. Bloom

The Bloom Community is not just a dating app. The platform is a hybrid inclusive community that includes features for dating, events organizing, and just plain socializing in a safe environment, making it a natural choice for polyamorous people.

Bloom Community features and tools that make it an ideal app for socializing and event organization also make it a strong choice for couples in an open relationship: the emphasis on real-life events makes it easy for couples in an open relationship to meet their potential new partners in a low-stress environment, instead of risking accusations of cheating or other issues.

Bloom community screenshot
Bloom Community is an inclusive site for queer folks and non-monogamous couples.

Bloom Community upholds the principles that are the most important in healthy open relationships: Trust, consent, and clear communication. The moderation team enforces those standards firmly.

Bloom Community is all about inclusion, bringing together features of a social app, dating app, and events app all in one place. The focus for Bloom is in making connections with new people and seeing where they go, so whatever your particular polyamorous style, you’ll find a warm welcome.

FAQs: Will Mainstream Dating Apps Ban a Poly Person?

Generally speaking, mainstream dating apps won’t ban an individual poly person, since polyamory isn’t against online dating guidelines on most platforms. However, misrepresenting yourself (using an app or site as a couple but making a profile as a single person) can get you banned.

The question is also an issue of the type of dating site or app you’re using. Casual hookup apps like Tinder tend to have more tolerance for ethical non-monogamy, and inclusive platforms like OkCupid may even let you identify your partner and link your profile to theirs. But platforms like Match that are more oriented to traditional monogamy are more likely to take a hardliner stance against polyamorous people.

What Are the Hallmarks of a Successful Open Relationship?

A lot of factors go into successful open relationships, but ultimately a successful open relationship looks a lot like a successful monogamous relationship. Clear communication is a major hallmark of an open relationship. And, of course, respect for emotional boundaries is a must as well.

People in a successful open relationship put a premium on honesty, transparency, and working through relationship issues instead of attempting to minimize them. Putting your partners’ needs front and center is an extremely important skill, no matter how many partners you have.

Where Do LGBTQ+ Folks Find Poly Partners?

Since there’s a fairly large overlap between polyamorous people and LGBTQ+ people, it shouldn’t be a surprise to find out that a lot of LGBTQ+ dating platforms are poly-friendly by default. 

MenNation welcomes not just single men, but male couples who are interested in exploring their sexual fantasies and finding community online. The dating site offers a nonjudgmental atmosphere and encourages users to be upfront and explore their desires with men.

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★★★★ 4.4/5.0
  • A massive men-only sex and swinger community
  • Browse profiles and send private messages to your favorites
  • Profiles feature erotic videos and sexually explicit blogs

LesbianPersonals is open to single women as well as to lesbian couples and straight-passing couples, so the options are plentiful for queer poly people. The online personals ad board and chat rooms provide a safe space for meeting women of any sexual orientation.

Category Rating
★★★★ 4.3/5.0
  • Create a free profile in less than a minute
  • Search filters can identify attractive singles and couples in the area
  • Strip tease videos, revealing photos, and other adult content

Lastly, 3Fun specifically caters to ethically non-monogamous singles and couples. The judgment-free atmosphere extends to sexual orientation and gender identity as much as it does to polyamory. If you’re already in a relationship (or in more than one), you can set up an individual dating profile and link to your partner or partners, or set up a couples account to approach other members as a team.

Monogamy is History — Modern Relationships Are So Much More!

Growing acceptance of polyamory makes it safer and easier for couples in open relationships to make their situations public. Now, thanks to online dating, poly couples can date without worrying about stigma. The online dating world has seen a growing trend in open relationship sites helping people find partners, join communities, and otherwise live their best life with the people they choose.

Choose the right dating platform to satisfy your curiosity and expand your circle of trust!

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