Thanks to the rise of online dating, married people face more temptation than ever before, and there are a lot of gray areas when mingling on an affair dating site or app. Where do you draw the line between harmless flirtation and actually having an affair? Is signing up for a dating site or app a transgression? Does chatting necessarily mean cheating? Some couples say yes, while others may not see it that way.
As Carrie Bradshaw from “Sex and the City” says, “Someone’s definition of what constitutes cheating is in direct proportion to how much they themselves want to cheat.”
If you’re considering stepping away from your marriage or relationship, exploring the best affair dating sites can provide a safe and anonymous space to weigh your options. Just be careful not to accidentally swipe right on your significant other and get caught.
Best Overall Affair Dating Sites
Hookup sites are frequented by singles and not-so singles of all ages and orientations. They’re fun places to shake things up and walk on the wild side without getting too invested or serious. Casual daters can use the following free-to-join sites to seek the gratification and excitement they’re missing in their everyday lives.
Ashley Madison is a breath of fresh air for single or attached folks experiencing a sex slump. This exciting dating site and app offer tons of opportunities to mingle, match, flirt, and hook up discreetly. Over 91 million profiles await you on Ashley Madison, and it's free to create an anonymous account.
- Discreetly arranges one-night stands
- More than 91 million profiles worldwide
- Travel-friendly features for seeking matches in other cities
- Browse Ashley Madison profiles 100% free »
Ashley Madison offers a discreet and exciting dating website where infidelity is a way of life. The married dating site’s motto is “Life is short. Have an affair.” No need to hold back or beat around the bush on this affair dating website and app.
Ashley Madison sees over 5 million monthly active users, and its database includes more than 80 million people, so there are plenty of avenues for finding a love affair. Lonely wives and husbands may seek an affair partner in real life, or they may only want to communicate online and keep their identity private. Ashley Madison is the best site for privacy because it can blur and mask faces in photos.
Approximately 60% of Ashley Madison users are on the lookout for casual encounters, and 44% of men and 39% of women on the site report having already engaged in an extramarital affair.
2. NaughtyCharm
When it comes to arranging hookups, NaughtyCharm is fast, easy, fun, and safe. This dating site has built a global network of sexy men and women who want to skip the small talk and cut right to the chase. If you're interested in short-term romance, NaughtyCharm is the place to go and get your flirt on.
- A global network of naughty singles over 18
- Ability to blur nude and explicit content, if desired
- Advanced search filters and one-on-one messaging
- Browse NaughtyCharm profiles 100% free »
As you can tell from its name, NaughtyCharm isn’t a site for do-gooders and straight-edge singles, and that’s why it’s one of the best affair dating sites. This casual sex platform can encourage a married person to embrace their naughty side and color outside the lines once in awhile.
NaughtyCharm lets you explore the hookup scene with just a username, and adding a profile picture is optional unless you’re ready to chat with someone. The site provides free messaging, but to join in the excitement, members need verified photos.
It’s worth noting that NaughtyCharm will not ask you to disclose your relationship status or dating history in your profile, but you can write all the juicy details in your bio if you want your dates to know what’s going on with you.
Registering for an account on Adult Friend Finder (AFF) is like speeding into the fast lane of the online dating world. This hookup site puts you in the center of action and encourages sexy singles and swingers to satisfy their secret fantasies. Anyone over 18 can join AFF and browse millions of profiles for free, but only full-fledged members have access to the revealing content in the community forums and chat rooms.
- One of the largest adults-only sex communities
- Free and fast registration process
- Dating forums and live chats foster live flirtation
- Browse Adult Friend Finder profiles 100% free »
With over 104 million users, Adult Friend Finder is undoubtedly the most popular adult dating site in the world, and it makes an erotic and illicit encounter available to anyone over the age of 18.
When you set up your free AFF account, you can identify yourself as a man, woman, couple, or group depending on your situation. AFF is a poly-friendly site, so don’t be surprised if a few swingers and cheaters come your way. You could get tips about how to have a successful open relationship, and you can satisfy your desire for an extramarital affair by sexting strangers, watching strip teases, and reading erotic stories. And you can arrange a secret affair on this married dating site as well.
Adult Friend Finder will help keep your married secrets as you explore everything this sex-driven community has to offer a married person.
Victoria Milan is a married dating site where affairs happen with no one being the wiser. It lets members mask their face, keep personal details hidden, and flirt anonymously by sending a wink or favoriting a profile. This discreet space embraces people looking to date in secret, and it has attracted over 5 million members and counting!
- Anonymity tools to hide faces in profile pictures
- Travel dating tools widen the match pool
- Over 16,000 new members joining every day
- Browse Victoria Milan profiles 100% free »
Victoria Milan keeps things fun, sexy, and anonymous 24/7. You can create a quick profile to add to the feed — real names are not required — and then you’ll have access to a secret vault of photos shared by adults near you.
The one thing everyone on the site has in common is they’re looking for an affair, so you don’t have to be bashful when talking to a new person.
Victoria Milan allows users to blur their faces in photos, and it isn’t judgy about if people are married or in relationships. If you’re looking for sex, that’s all that needs to be said.
FriendFinder-X offers sexy singles the gratifying experience of meeting hot dates within a few clicks. This hookup site is designed to excite people's imaginations and fill them with sexual energy. Whether you're chatting privately or in a group forum, singles and swingers can be upfront about their sexual desires, fetishes, and fantasies.
- A casual personals site for singles, couples, and groups
- Profiles have suggestive photos and strip tease videos
- Chat live via a two-way webcam or private messaging
- Browse FriendFinder-X profiles 100% free »
FriendFinder-X prides itself on being a discreet affair site where “good girls do bad things.” That includes straying from a relationship and having a sexually charged extramarital affair.
FriendFinder-X is designed for singles, those not-so-single, and open couples seeking casual fun without any long-term ties. It’s perfect for those wanting to add a little spice to their lives without changing their current situation.
With a FriendFinder-X dating profile, you can explore local hotties and engage in flirtatious chats without revealing your true identity. If someone special catches your eye, you can always take things to the next level by sending that man or woman pictures, exchanging phone numbers, or arranging a casual encounter. You never know who you’ll meet or what will happen on FriendFinder-X, and that’s part of the fun.
6. Tinder
First impressions matter on Tinder. The dating app gives its users the chance to find romance by liking the photos and bylines of local singles. The app's casual atmosphere encourages flirty conversations that quickly lead to exchanging numbers or arranging in-person dates. Every week, Tinder facilitates over 1.5 million dates and hookups in 190+ countries.
- The dating app of choice for millions of sexually active singles
- Accelerating the dating process through swiping
- Has led to over 97 billion mutual matches
- Browse Tinder profiles 100% free »
Unless you’ve been living under a married rock for the last 10 years, you’ve probably heard of Tinder. It’s the most popular dating app for 20-somethings and 30-somethings, and it is responsible for arranging over 1.5 million dates per week.
Tinder welcomes singles of all ages, orientations, and backgrounds, and you’ll even find some users who are married or in a relationship. A research firm called the GlobalWebIndex (GWI) estimated that 30% of Tinder users are married and 12% are in a committed relationship. Those numbers seem awfully high to us, but it underscores just how common cheating on Tinder is.
Tinder’s popularity makes it a dangerous space for anyone dating under the radar. A hush affair may not stay secret for long if you maintain an active Tinder profile. Buster Smith warns cheaters, “All it takes is one person to see your profile and bring it to the attention of your significant other.”
7. OkCupid
OkCupid's free communication features make it great for singles seeking a no-strings-attached hookup. The dating site and app allow singles to create a brief profile and dive into match recommendations within minutes. Singles can swipe up a storm until they strike a good match and take the conversation to the next level.
- Free private messaging available to all members
- Users can state that they're seeking hookups on their profiles
- Responsible for 50,000 dates per week
- Browse OkCupid profiles 100% free »
OkCupid is a free dating site and app where users can have a lengthy conversation and make romantic connections based on true compatibility. This isn’t exactly marketed as a cheating site — but it can help married men and women find a compatible partner or casual sexual encounters.
When you join OkCupid, you can be open about your relationship status and what type of connection you’re looking for, whether it’s hookups, short-term dating, friendship, or something long-term. The dating profile offers many sections to describe your interests, values, favorite movies or TV shows, and life goals.
OkCupid allows members to be themselves while picking up dates, and that begins with the open-ended profile setup. Some users stick to the basics and leave a little mystery for their matches, while others fill in every section and bare their hearts in hopes of a perfect match.
Plenty of Fish lowers the cost of romance by allowing casual daters to send private chats for free. It's easy to make a fast connection thanks to Plenty of Fish's free messaging system. On average, POF members send over 1 billion messages a month, and these chats often lead to romantic encounters in the real world.
- Free instant messages for all singles
- Over 150 million members in 20 countries
- The MeetMe section highlights local hotties
- Browse Plenty of Fish profiles 100% free »
Since 2003, Plenty of Fish has established itself as a free-wheeling dating site and app full of genuine men and women. The POF community is active in 20 countries, and it boasts having over 150 million members.
It’s completely free to send messages to anyone on Plenty of Fish — you don’t even have to create a mutual match — and free members also benefit from the 24/7 support of the Help Center, which answers common questions about the signup process, messaging features, image policy, and security concerns.
This online dating website vets new users, so you won’t run into a fake profile as you seek a potential partner for married dating or a foreign affair.
“Our commitment is to make sure you feel welcomed, safe, and free to be yourself,” according to the Plenty of Fish Community Rules. “It’s important to be respectful in every interaction. Our community does not tolerate hate speech, racism, or bigotry.”
Best LGBTQ Affair Dating Sites
The Netflix show “Grace and Frankie” is about two senior women coping with the fact that their ex-husbands are gay and have been having an affair for 20 years. The show tackles the complicated fallout of cheating, divorcing, and coming out of the closet. Although it is initially painful, everyone eventually ends up in a good place.
“When you left, I thought my life was over,” Frankie says to her ex in one episode. “And now I love having that bed to myself. It’s fantastic. I sleep in a giant X!”
If you’re gay, lesbian, bi, trans, or just plan curious, the following married dating sites can help you explore your feelings and decide what you want.
9. MenNation
MenNation has tons of X-rated content to arouse the senses and stimulate conversation. The hookup site attracts single men and gay couples all over the world and has grown its network to include over 93 million people. Free members can browse these profiles for as long as they want and send flirts to anyone who catches their eye.
- A massive men-only sex and swinger community
- Browse profiles and send private messages to your favorites
- Profiles feature erotic videos and sexually explicit blogs
- Browse MenNation profiles 100% free »
MenNation is a men-only online dating site where you can search for a sexual partner by age, location, and body type. The dating platform gives gay singles and couples instant access to a world of romance.
Every day, about 70,000 men visit MenNation in search of excitement, romance, and sexual encounters, and this married dating site doesn’t disappoint. It’s free to create an account and browse the profiles of men like you. Who knows? Someone sexy may catch your eye or send a provocative message to your inbox.
Whether you’re still in the closet or openly gay, you can use MenNation as a private place to meet guys who share your interests and desires. A secret affair with a married man is well within reach thanks to MenNation.
10. Grindr
Grindr facilitates hookups by telling local singles where the hottest guys in town are and giving them a direct line of communication. It's easy to jump into this active dating pool and start flirting with gay and bisexual men near you.
- Sexually active men can create free profiles
- Matching system uses GPS information to find local dates
- Millions of prospects available in 192 countries
- Browse Grindr profiles 100% free »
Last but certainly not least, Grindr is a thriving gay dating app where men can be themselves and pick up dates on the go. The app uses location-based settings to find dates who are within walking distance of you, and that makes it the perfect wingman for married men at a club or bar.
Millions of singles use Grindr for arranging an illicit encounter with hotties, but it can also lead to an honest-to-goodness committed relationship. “Make whatever you want out of it,” said a Reddit user in a thread about Grindr. “Cute guy messaged me, we planned on hooking up…now we’ve been together for two years.”
Grindr offers a low-key atmosphere where guys can get to know the dating scene and build confidence one match at a time. Whether you want a secret affair or sugar daddy, this online dating platform can hook you up.
What is the Most Successful Dating Site?
There’s no easy answer for this question because success comes in many different forms in the online dating industry. For instance, Tinder has created over 97 billion matches since its launch in 2012, but that impressive number doesn’t translate to IRL dates, relationships, and marriages.
Adult Friend Finder boasts having the world’s largest casual dating and sex community, and Hinge says it has the highest first-date success rate of any other dating app. But, again, those stats don’t necessarily mean long-term success.
Which Dating Site is Completely Free?
Pretty much every dating site is somewhat free, but only a handful are 100% forever free for everyone. OkCupid is one of my favorite free dating sites because its basic membership never expires and includes instant messaging.
In 2004, OkCupid's founders decided to create a fool-proof formula for love, and they launched a free dating site to delve into what personal attributes made relationships work. OkCupid members can send unlimited messages for free. It's easy to discover mutual interests and compatibility on the platform's information-rich dating profiles.
- Free, unlimited communication for everyone
- Singles can swipe or search for a compatible date
- Over 91 million connections every year
- Browse OkCupid profiles 100% free »
OkCupid does have an A-List subscription plan that includes unlimited likes, advanced search filters, and an ad-free experience, but it is completely optional and not necessary to a successful online dating experience.
You don’t have to pay anything to like, match, chat, and date people on OkCupid, and that’s liberating for daters who feel they don’t meet enough singles in real life.
How Much Does Ashley Madison Cost?
Ashley Madison is easily one of the biggest names in the affair dating space, and many experts would rank it among the best dating sites for married people. However, we feel its pricing model is a bit too rich for the average online dater, so we’d recommend trying more cost-effective alternatives to meet your married dating needs.
An Ashley Madison subscription plan starts at $69.99 a month — that’s the cheapest option — and the affair site’s premium features include unlimited messaging and the ability to match with people in different cities. Be warned: subscriptions automatically renew, which means users have to go into their settings if they want to cancel their subscription and not be charged every month.
Ashley Madison is a discreet dating site with over 91 million profiles in its private database, and it is full of temptation. The platform offers a judgment-free zone where people can consider their options and chat with locals who are willing to get together on the down low.
- A uniquely open-minded dating network
- Privacy-conscious features
- Over 1.4 million matches per month
- Browse Ashley Madison profiles 100% free »
Something else we appreciate about Ashley Madison is its discreet payment processing. The affair site won’t out you by having its infamous name show up on credit card bills or bank statements. Your payments will look innocuous to any prying eyes. Privacy is a top priority for the Ashley Madison team, particularly in the wake of its leaked data scandal in 2015.
Married individuals often turn to Ashley Madison due to its reputation, but any of the adult dating sites on this list could lead to a secretive encounter, discreet affair, or even a committed relationship.
Is Gleeden in the U.S.?
Yes, Gleeden is an affair dating site available in 190 countries, including the U.S. The company is based in France (seems fitting, right?), but it has an international following of more than 5 million members.
Americans should note that Gleeden is primarily a European dating site, so it will work best if you’re traveling abroad or just want to chat with someone online. It’s not going to have a lot of options for Americans seeking local dates.
Consider Your Options on an Affair Dating Site
The concept of cheating varies for everyone. Some people equate looking at porn or fantasizing about others with infidelity, while others believe a bit of flirtation is harmless and micro-cheating is just a part of life. Boundaries shift from one relationship to another, and it’s up to you to decide what crosses the line and how far you’re willing to go.
Joining one of the best affair dating sites could be the first step to stepping out of your marriage, or it could be a short-lived fantasy that makes you appreciate what you have all the more.
Whether you’re feeling restless or just a little curious, you can browse an anonymous app or site to figure out what you want. Keep in mind that having an affair is a serious decision, and it could lead to some serious consequences if you’re not careful. Don’t take the plunge unless you’re prepared for everything that could come after. Good luck!
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