Long-term relationships and marriages can be fulfilling. They encourage people to grow and bring a sense of comfort to day-to-day life. On the other hand, keeping that “spark” alive in a partnership that has seen many years can be difficult. Sometimes that initial flame starts to die down into small embers. 

If you’ve found yourself feeling dissatisfied or uninspired by your partnership, or if you’re single and looking to engage in an exciting and passionate affair, Ashley Madison is among the best and most popular affair dating sites worldwide.

The dating site and app have a user base of over 5 million monthly users, making Ashley Madison a good option for those seeking a range of local options for affairs and no-strings connections. If you’re on the fence about taking the leap, read on for TK reviews from real people about what it’s like to use Ashley Madison.

1. An Anonymous User Expresses No Regrets

When you’re in a relationship for decades (or more), it’s natural for the heat and passion to ebb and flow. You and your partner may not be as sexually active with each other, may not want to spend as much quality time with one another, or you may even feel the mutual attraction start to slip. 

If you’ve ever experienced this situation, you’re not alone. An anonymous Ashley Madison user shared his experience using the married dating site while he was in a monogamous marriage.

Category Rating
★★★★★ 4.8/5.0
  • Discreetly arranges one-night stands and extramarital affairs
  • More than 80 million profiles worldwide
  • Travel-friendly features for seeking matches in other cities

Twelve years after marrying his high school sweetheart, this user began to feel discontent with his sex life. He shared that his wife’s weight gain and his increased libido began to affect how attracted he was to her, and increased his desire to look elsewhere for fulfilling his sexual needs. 

“As time passed, I reflected on my limited experiences in light of the realization that I may spend the rest of my life fundamentally unsatisfied,” he wrote. “I had married out of convenience and safety with little regard for anything deeper, other than the avoidance of any kind of insecurity, pain, or challenge.”

Like many people, he had heard of Ashley Madison before, but never tried it — or any other dating app. He was intentional about finding a passionate connection, so he filled out a detailed profile in the hopes of attracting “the kind of woman I had always fantasized about: older, professional, intelligent, witty, attractive.” 

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A passionate affair may scratch that itch you’ve been feeling in a sexually dull relationship.

Once he found a woman in a city nearby whom he felt an attraction to, they began emailing and agreed to meet up. After talking for an hour while sitting in a parking lot, they realized that they were definitely compatible and wanted to take their relationship to the next level. His wife was going out of town that weekend, so a plan was formed. 

The user’s affair partner came over and once they talked even further, he realized how strong their connection could become. They continued to have frequent sexual visits and more conversations over the following weeks, and after a few months, they both confessed that they had fallen for each other. 

At the time of his writing, the user shared that the Ashley Madison hack had just occurred, and he was prepared to be one of the millions of users whose private information would be leaked. That said, he also wrote that this incident wouldn’t stop him from continuing to pursue a passionate relationship with his affair partner, who wasn’t affected by the leak as women didn’t need to enter card information to use the site. 

Smiling young African American businesswoman working on a laptop at her desk in a bright modern office with colleagues in the background
Women who use Ashley Madison enjoy an extra layer of privacy because it doesn’t require their credit card or personal information.

“If the hackers release my information, I will take responsibility for my actions and the decisions I have been making,” he wrote. “I will embrace the consequences. I found what I didn’t even know I was seeking: a partner who makes me feel alive and passionate. I found love, and I couldn’t be happier in that respect. I could never go back to my old life and self, and I have no regrets.”

2. A PTA Mom Came Into Her Own on the Affair Site

The saying “don’t judge a book by its cover” often turns out to be a wise concept, especially when it comes to people assuming certain roles in life. Women who are mothers, for example, often have their motherhood seen as their main identity, which robs them of their individuality and unique personhood. This combined with a passionless marriage can drive even the most devoted wives and mothers to find their own happiness outside of the home. 

One previous Ashley Madison user was a mother, a wife, and even a PTA member. She had been feeling unsatisfied in her marriage for a long time, and was already in the process of a divorce when the idea to join Ashley Madison struck her. In the year that she was on the affair site, she had several exciting and fulfilling experiences — many that far exceeded her expectations of using the platform.

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Motherhood often takes over as the only identity some women are left with after having children, so an exciting and passionate affair can bring them back to themselves.

The PTA mom and soon-to-be divorcee wrote that she didn’t feel right joining a traditional dating app as she was still legally married, but knew that she could connect with men who were in a similar situation through Ashley Madison. Many of the men who actively use the site are also in loveless or passionless marriages and long to find a sexual and stimulating relationship with other women. 

This woman enjoyed the company of an amazing man and father who simply wanted companionship — they didn’t end up being physically intimate at all. Others, like an FWB she is still friends with now, were purely sexual connections. And one man she met and dated for seven months expressed his love for her, bought her pricey gifts, and even promised to leave his wife so they could be together (which she knew was not true). 

Whether it’s a friend with benefits or a long-term lover, Ashley Madison can help make connections.

As for the general consensus about her experience? She wrote, “I’ve learned it doesn’t take much for a man to stray. And I’ve learned to cherish what I have. Most men were on Ashley Madison because they claimed they didn’t feel appreciated. Appreciate your husband or partner, and let them know how much every damn day. I think knowing this makes me a better partner than I was when I was married.”

3. A Journalist Has a Scandalous Night at “Disneyland”

When you’re looking to have a no-strings relationship or pursue an extramarital affair, it’s important to get a good sense of which platform might work best for your needs. For a writer under the pseudonym “Sexy Liberation,” Ashley Madison was just the ticket for the kind of encounter he was looking for: “I like to bang wives. That’s my fetish,” he wrote.

Although men are required to pay for messaging on the site, Sexy Liberation expressed that it was worth it for the results he got. He met up with a woman he referred to as “Samantha.” Samantha was the wife of a local politician in his town — one he particularly loathed. He got excited about the possibility of having sex with the wife of someone he hated, and although he wasn’t thrilled about her “vibe” at first, this aspect piqued his interest. 

Photo of a bedroom
For one Ashley Madison user, a sexy night in a luxury hotel jacuzzi with a married woman was a fantasy fulfilled.

Sexy Liberation and Samantha met up with her children in a luxury hotel outside of their town. She told her husband that she was taking her kids to “Disneyland,” and once the children fell asleep, she and the writer went to town on each other in the jacuzzi… pound town, to be clear. 

“I would say that Ashley Madison helps set up meets for one-night stands, but nothing long-term. I used it to meet women, saying that women can use it to meet some fantastic guys,” he said. “Whatever you are looking for, Ashley Madison will provide.”

4. A Married Woman Found a Passionate Affair

Although Ashley Madison is often assumed to be an affair site that caters specifically to married men, you may be surprised to know that plenty of women seek out affairs on the site themselves. An anonymous woman, who used the site for 5 years, said she found plenty of success through it, and even fell in love with one of her affair partners. 

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Sometimes all you need is someone to make you feel passion and pleasure again.

This anonymous user shared that, in her 15 years of marriage, she had already had two affairs behind her husband’s back — just not from Ashley Madison. “While my husband was a wonderful man, there had been something missing from my marriage for some time, leading me to seek affection, love and sex elsewhere,” she wrote. This sentiment tends to be common among married men who use the site as well, but the stigma seems to hit women users more heavily than their male counterparts. 

This writer told the story of meeting a man she referred to as “Melbourne” — a successful, handsome, educated man who shared an instant chemistry with her. From the beginning of their relationship, he made it clear that he loved his wife and had zero intentions of leaving her. He simply needed the sexual fulfillment that he wasn’t getting within his marriage. 

“This was a common thread with every man I got to know from the site: their wives have simply stopped giving them sex, or at the very least, become utterly complacent,” Anonymous wrote. “These men were missing cuddles, affection, compliments and sex. They were so bereft of it that they were enchanted by the merest hint of a willing woman and a warm bed. Surely sex is a fundamental part of a marriage? Some women — many women — don’t seem to think so.”

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There are plenty of successful, attractive men — married or single — who use Ashley Madison.

After two years as affair partners, Melbourne expressed his love for Anonymous, and quickly retreated and became distant from her. The connection had become something neither of them had planned for, and he didn’t want to risk ruining his marriage because of it. 

The man she began an affair with after Melbourne simply wanted a sexual connection, but didn’t want to pay an escort for it. Despite enjoying the physical fulfillment from it, Anonymous wasn’t quite looking for that kind of affair — one devoid of any emotional or intellectual chemistry. 

“I started to realize just how ruthless it is online. The organic affairs I’d had, had been far more fulfilling,” she said. “I’ve spent the last five years on Ashley Madison chasing the rush of those first two ‘real life’ affairs, looking for that deep connection and all-encompassing intensity. I’ve yet to find it, but I’m not ready to stop looking.”

Ashley Madison Can Be the Right Move… As Long as You Know What You’re Looking For

As these reviewers have expressed, Ashley Madison isn’t for everyone, but it can be for you — as long as you know what to expect. Ashley Madison has something for everyone. Single men and women can meet romantic partners who are married and looking to relieve their sexual frustrations. Married people can find one-night connections or even romantic affairs that last for years to come. And casual daters can meet a new friend to simply spend time with and feel a little less alone.

Category Rating
★★★★ 4.2/5.0

The registration process and profile setup are simple, and the site now has a significant amount of safety and privacy features to ensure that their past mistakes — like massive data leaks — never happen again. If you’re a woman, you can have an extra layer of this assurance because you won’t need to enter in card information or many personal identifying details. Simply build a minimal profile, and let the men come to you. If you’re a man seeking no-strings encounters, you’ll be pleased to find a user base of millions of women ready to say hi and get to hooking up.

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