Key Takeaways

Have you ever been on a first date, and the first question the other person asks you is, “So what do you do?”

Whether you’re the person who rolls their eyes at that sort of question — or, like me, you’re very into that question because you’re passionate about what you do, and enjoy learning about other people’s passions — you’ve got to admit: it’s a big part of dating.

But what if that’s all your date wanted to talk about? And not because they’re simply interested in learning more about you. Well, it turns out, for many of your dating app users, this is exactly what’s happening out in the field.

According to a new survey, 1 in 3 people said they’ve used dating apps solely for job or career-related purposes. Yeah, you read that right. What’s more, the majority of survey respondents said they’ve managed to land referrals, interviews, and even job offers through their matches. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve used dating apps for all kinds of things: a one-night stand, a long-lasting love affair, an awkward first date. But never in my life have I used it to secure my dream job. But with layoffs left and right, the job market going up and down, and the hiring practices of many corporations, I have to say: I get it.

I may not agree with it, but I get it. Resume Builder said nearly half of the people in the survey weren’t just doing this for no reason, either. As you would expect, they were motivated to leverage dating apps due to the poor job market. When times are tough and money is tight, it might seem enticing to get a free dinner and maybe a job, too?

But is this really a good thing for us, the ones in the dating industry. From an industry standpoint, this date-to-hire mentality isn’t just an interesting phenomenon, but maybe also a threat to what we’re building.

After all, we’re not trying to be the next LinkedIn (although, from personal experience, I’ve had a few men slide into my DMs in a flirtatious way on the career website, too.) 

Why Is This Happening Now?

It’s no secret that the job market is deeply hurting right now with layoff after layoff. That creates a super competitive job market, which creates hiring slowdowns and people just needing anything — something — to work.

A girl can only scroll LinkedIn for so long before she goes insane, so, naturally, there is also a rise in something called “networking your way in.” It’s just like it sounds: Networking hard, so that you might meet the one person who can help you land the job you want, faster. 

But how do dating apps fit in? Well, in a way, folks are finding it easier than sending a message on someone’s inundated LinkedIn profile. We provide direct access, a filter for location, targeting demographics, and even a way to have a personal conversation through prompts that help someone get in. 

Of course, this is supposed to be used for dating purposes. 

“There’s a term in the entertainment industry called, ‘Your network = Your net worth,’” Anthony Canapi, an LGBTQ+ Dating Expert and Founder & CEO of Best Man Matchmaking, tells Dating News.

“Because of how competitive each job industry is nowadays when it comes to hiring suitable candidates, people are now opting away from job boards and seeking dating apps for a ‘soft launch networking possibility,” he said. 

Folks are hoping that other daters’ profiles will include job criteria or the company they work for that may be hiring. Hey, it’s not exactly ethical, or helpful for those looking to actually date, but it is a strategy that’s happening.

It speaks to a larger issue: When traditional systems, like LinkedIn or sending your resumé a million times, feel inaccessible, people do what they can to repurpose whatever tools do provide access. Enter: your dating app.

When Users Want Different Things

So what happens when one of your users downloads your app to find love while the other is looking to secure a job? Well, it’s not great.

“When a dater downloads a dating app, they hope to make quality, romantic connections,” Canapi explains, “Now that people are utilizing and manipulating the dating apps for other reasons, it no longer serves as the app the dater was originally seeking.”

Most of the time, people look to download apps to seek people with the same interests. Someone who also likes to camp, or wander museums or also loves matcha as much as they do. But if your app is inundated with this job-seeker mentality, chances are, the likelihood of one of your users finding a quality match decreases.

That could be bad news for you, my friend. If you’re purely running a dating app, people who are actually looking for their next big romance might be scared away if they’ve been hit with, “So can you get me a job?” a million times over.

A dating app’s purpose is to facilitate a date — not to be a soft launch job bulletin.

Unless, of course, you frame it like some apps are doing, and provide a way to have a purely job-focused connection using your product, too.

“A great example is Tinder now offering different types of connections,” Canapi says, “From friends, long-term, even short-term, and fun.”

I used to use Bumble Business time and time again when I first started freelancing. 

“Are They Into Me, or My Job?”

For the users actually using your app as intended, they might be wondering, “Are they into me, or my job?”

“Instead of wanting to get to know ‘you, for you,’ users may want to get to know ‘you and your professional accolades.’” Canapi explains, “This can cause frustration and harm as those seeking meaningful intentions can feel used for personal gain,  and something that can be tossed away.”

In my opinion, for platforms that say they’re built on emotional vulnerability, I have a feeling that being “pitched” at instead of pursued may not be a good look in creating user trust. 

This, in my and Canapi’s opinion, is something that platforms should actively crack down on, or learn to adapt to it in some other way.

What Should Platforms Do?

You might be scratching your head and asking, “What now?” Well, all hope is not lost.

Start with acknowledging what’s happening with your users. Still, encourage them to put their best self out there. But say it like it is: We ask you to put a lot of yourself online in the pursuit of dating. Sometimes, though, that can come across like building a resumé. 

For Canapi, who coaches dating clients to treat their dating profile as a resumé, it’s never meant to actually be a resumé. Instead, his approach is to help daters take their profile seriously. It has me thinking that his approach has a point.

Yes, 1 in 3 people admit to using dating apps to make their next career jump. That’s a lot of people when you think about it. But for many others, those who are actually looking for love or connection, this isn’t the case.

Either you must make that a career-oriented feature of the app in the same mindset as Bumble Business, or take a strong stance against using your app to make your next move up the career ladder. 

One thing rings true, no matter what: You must do something.