The Scoop: Each city has a dating scene that’s truly its own, and you want your matchmaker to understand that. Michelle Jacoby of DC Matchmaking talked about what makes dating different in the District of Columbia and how her matchmaking service can be transformative for professionals ready for the real thing.
Your dating experience is going to look different depending on where you live. When I look back on my dating experiences in different cities and states, each one was influenced by the culture and makeup of that place.
The apps you use, where you go to meet people, and the kind of people you’re brushing shoulders with have everything to do with where you live.
If you choose to hire a matchmaker, you’ll want them to understand the nuances of dating in your city.
Washington, D.C., is home to people of diverse backgrounds, cultures, and professions, and the city’s dynamic demographics shine through in its vibrant dating scene. The district’s dating pool is full of dedicated professionals who value their careers, time, and privacy.
D.C.-area singles interested in matchmaking should find a matchmaker who understands not just their unique personal background and dating hopes, but also knows how to navigate the city’s distinctive mix of personal and professional mingling.
Michelle Jacoby is a dating coach, matchmaker, and the founder of DC Matchmaking, a discreet upscale matchmaking company for DMV professionals. Michelle talked to us about what makes dating in D.C. different and how she helps her clients find connections that last.
“I’m unapologetically DMV-centric, and I’m a local,” Michelle said. “I think what differentiates me in terms of matchmaking is that I have resisted the urge to scale and grow. When you sign up for matchmaking with DC Matchmaking– you’re signing up for matchmaking with me.”
Upscale Introductions for Commitment-Ready Singles
Michelle crafted her matchmaking approach with the needs of D.C. singles in mind. “D.C. is so interesting,” she said. “Privacy is one of the strongest values in D.C., more so than in other towns. It’s not a town where people want their private lives to be aired.”
This creates unique predicaments in every kind of dating, not just matchmaking. Many singles may feel hesitant or unwilling to use online dating to protect their privacy. When it comes to matchmaking, singles are often looking for a matchmaker who can conduct a confidential search.
Singles in D.C. are also dedicated professionals and value their work. “People in D.C. are very passionate about their work, and people often move here for their industry and the opportunities that are here,” Michelle said. “They also really value diversity.”
Michelle said since many D.C. singles are focused on their careers, the average age for first marriages tends to be higher than the rest of the country. The district’s unique demographics make it a great place to meet a quality person.
“My favorite part of my job is that I get to work with people of all ages, races, religions– D.C. is such a diverse community and that’s what I love about it,” Michelle told us.
Michelle works with only a handful of matchmaking clients at once. “Maximum 10, but I usually have around five active clients,” she said. She gets to know each prospective client to decide whether she’s the right matchmaker for them.
The initial interview with Michelle usually takes a couple of hours. If DC Matchmaking is the right fit, Michelle gets to work. She begins crafting a matchmaking strategy and taps into her database to find stellar introductions.
“Right now, I’m primarily focusing on matchmaking men because my database is heavily female,” Michelle said. “This is typical of most matchmakers. But because of that, I created a coaching program specifically for women.”
Offering Dating Services Professionals Need
Matchmaking isn’t the right dating approach for everyone. Michelle said she’s identified a need among single professional women for dating resources that recognize their unique situation. “I’ve helped women of all ages, even in their 50s, 60s, and 70s, find their happily ever after,” Michelle said.
Through coaching, Michelle helps clients master online dating, craft a winning dating strategy, and learn to find excitement in the process. She teaches her clients how to avoid making the same dating mistakes they have previously made and how to keep their standards high.
Michelle’s coaching approach is designed for women of all ages. In many cases, older women are looking for different things in dating than their younger counterparts. Older women who date after divorce or the loss of a partner typically have less dating experience and need to learn how to navigate today’s complicated dating world.
Michelle brings her own personal experiences to the table and gives her clients space to vent their frustrations with dating. She understands the frustration of mediocre date after mediocre date when you’re looking for a real connection.
“I teach skills so you can present yourself strategically, but also with ease, on a date,” Michelle said. “I show them where they can meet quality men online and offline, and I also teach them to hold strong boundaries and date skillfully.”
Michelle’s coaching program for women encourages women to enjoy the dating process. Her free e-book, called “Never Waste Time on the Wrong Man Again,” gives readers a strategic plan to meet more compatible men and have better dates.
The book walks readers through the exact steps Michelle used to find her own husband. The book covers first-date chemistry, how to detect red flags early on, and reiterates the importance of clear boundaries, especially in the early stages of dating.
“You Are the Dream Job”
Dating can be a confusing and stressful endeavor. The better prepared you are for the process– both emotionally and strategically– the more success, and less heartbreak, you’ll experience along the way.
“There’s a concept I teach in my program for women that resonates with a lot of the professionals here in D.C.,” Michelle said. “It’s such a professionally minded place, I use this analogy that when they’re dating, they are the dream job.”
Michelle has her clients imagine themselves as the ideal job. “When a man is applying for that dream position, your expectations of his behavior need to be similar to the expectation you would have if a candidate were applying for a dream job.”
If someone consistently shows up late– they’re not the right person for the job. The same goes if they’re unenthusiastic, making unreasonable demands, or not being entirely truthful.
These are behaviors that you should avoid if you’re looking for a long-term partner, especially if they occur in the early stages of dating.
“If a man’s not enthusiastic about the job– why would you offer it to him?” Michelle said. “If a man insists you drive across town to his neck of the woods for dates, he’s not the ideal candidate. Would you drive to him for his job interview? Of course not!”
Michelle said this analogy helps women avoid wasting their time in dating. “If I had the dream job and I was interviewing, I would expect the best of the best. I think there’s a scarcity mindset for some women, and they become willing to settle.”
Michelle teaches her matchmaking and coaching clients how to get the best outcomes out of dating. Even if their journey doesn’t culminate with ‘The One,’ the process teaches them a lot about themselves, others, and what they’re looking for.
“Shifting your mindset is so important,” Michelle said. “Your attitude on dates should be that you’re freaking awesome, and people are lucky to get to know you!”