The Scoop: Relationship upkeep isn’t always easy. Flamme is the relationship app that uses AI to learn about you and your partner– and bring you closer together. The app was designed for busy and long-distance couples and features an AI coach, discovery questions, and plenty of avenues for deepened intimacy.
We often hear talk about the importance of attending to our overall well-being, and the idea can get overwhelming. Sometimes, just taking care of yourself—physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially— can feel like a full-time job in itself.
Luckily, there are plenty of tools that make maintaining well-being easier. Two of my most important tools for physical well-being are my climbing gym membership and run tracker app. For emotional well-being, my best tools are my journal and the simple breathing exercises you can find online.
Relational wellness requires upkeep as well, and this upkeep is made easier when couples have the same kind of tools they would use for their personal well-being. These tools are things couples can go back to so they can reconnect and spend quality time with just each other.
Relationship wellness tools should be accessible and easy to use. The whole goal of these tools is for couples to use them regularly to check in and get excited about the future. In other words, a great tool is useless if it’s not being used right.
Relationship apps are a fantastic tool, but you and your partner actually have to use it to reap the benefits. That’s why it’s important to choose tools that work for you.
Flamme is a relationship app that’s redefining the capabilities of relationship wellness tools. The app uses AI to learn about couples through daily questions and engagement and then makes informed recommendations to help them grow closer. It’s a relationship wellness tool designed for long-distance and busy couples.
Ankit Nayal is the founder and CEO of Flamme, and he talked to us about his inspiration for the app and how it’s making a difference in the lives of real couples. Ankit got the idea for Flamme after realizing the potential of combining AI and relationship coaching.
“Flamme is like the co-pilot for relationships,” Ankit said. “I worked as a couples coach for years, and I realized that while coaching is super helpful, it comes with a big price tag and it’s not always accessible. We decided to build an AI tool that could cater to similar needs.”
The Always Available Coaching Alternative
As a couples coach, Ankit saw first-hand how important it is for couples to find time to nurture their relationships. Coaching could be one way to do this, but it’s not always accessible for every couple. These tools can be hard to find for many couples, whether it be due to finances, time, or location.
“There was a high price attached to coaching, and you’re also restricted by geographical constraints and having to find someone you like in the area you live in,” Ankit explained. “Our AI tool was built to help meet this needs, but it’s far more affordable and accessible 24/7 in the palm of your hand.”
At first, the engine was available online and could help with generalized answers. As effective as the AI was, Ankit said he wanted it to give advice informed by deeper knowledge of a couple and the relationship.
“The problem is the website isn’t personalized,” Ankit said. The engine doesn’t know what’s actually happening in your relationship. It can give you one-off advice, but it’s kind of like asking a stranger for advice.”
Flamme takes the website AI engine and teaches it about a couple through engagement with the app. “If the website is a trailer, the app is the movie,” Ankit explained. “It can instruct you and understand where you’re falling off, where you’re doing well, and what the right direction for you is.”
While Flamme uses many approaches and ideas from couples coaching, Ankit clarified it’s not a perfect substitution. “Relationship coaching has a big space, and we’re not trying to fill or compete for that space,” he said.
Couples can approach Flamme as a type of preventative care for their relationship. “I always use this example,” Ankit said. “You don’t go to the gym when your leg is broken, right? If your leg is broken, you go to the doctor, but if you’re trying to prevent a broken leg, you will go to the gym to strengthen it.”
Flamme gives couples the tools they need to stay on the same page with authentic communication, so they can avoid letting small issues turn into big ones. The app isn’t designed to therapize or fix big problems– it’s about giving couples a place they can turn to to feel close.
“What we try to do is help with the relationship health and ensure that people don’t end up breaking their leg in a relationship,” Ankit said.
An App that Learns About Your Relationship
Flamme is set apart from other couples apps because it can learn about you, your partner, and your relationship. The app’s AI adds a layer of personalization that mimics the kind of support one can find in couples coaching.
Couples get a daily question designed to spark meaningful conversations. Flamme was designed with modern couples in mind, and the questions aim to attend to the common struggles they face. The questions get at matters of communication, conflict, and other relational health factors, while also giving couples light-hearted prompts.
Flamme encourages couples to strengthen their bond with interactive tools like quizzes, bucket lists, and access to Love AI, Flamme’s own relationship AI tool. Couples can also use Flamme to send quick updates to each other and share digital interactions.
Flamme’s AI Love Coach can give advice and suggestions built around the information it’s been given about you and your partner. The AI allows Flamme to give couples more personalized and specific advice than the average couples app, and couples can go to the AI Love Coach when they need a bit of extra guidance.
“We looked at the market quite a bit and realized that a lot of tests to help you understand your love languages and attachment styles, but none to understand what kind of personality you are in a relationship,” Ankit explained. “What triggers you, what helps you, what’s soothing, and what could help you grow.”
Ankit and the team have been researching for months to formulate Flamme’s soon-to-be-released 16 Relationship Personalities. Individuals can discover their relationship personality by taking a short quiz. Based on their answers, they’ll fall into one of the 16 categories.
“It’s based on a lot of different aspects– emotional and logical,” Ankit explained. “We gauge your love language, attachment style, conflict style, and whether you’re passive or direct.” Flamme’s personalities feature aims to give individuals and couples invaluable insights on how they show up in relationships, and why.
The personality quiz will also strengthen Flamme’s AI capabilities. “We’re trying to understand the couples who are on the platform and understand how we can deliver more value to them,” Ankit said. “The number one step is to understand their personality. Once we understand that, we can feed this to the AI.”
Flamme’s AI will be able to give individuals and couples advice tailored to their unique relationship personality. The personality test gives the AI more information on how a person usually behaves in a relationship, improving its ability to give personalized advice and resources.
Flamme Connects Couples
A tool is only useful if you use it, and Ankit said he recognizes that AI tools aren’t necessarily commonplace in most people’s lives. “Let’s be honest, AI coaching is not something a lot of people are going to use on a daily basis,” he said.
Ankit continued, “When we launched the AI coach, one of our initial struggles was with retention. A lot of people just didn’t come back to it.”
Flamme took cues from interactive apps like Duolingo and gamified its experience. “We created habit loops within our app using a daily question with pops up every day, and then you maintain a streak with your partner. If you don’t answer, Flamme scolds you a bit,” Ankit said.
Every activity couples do on Flamme teaches the app more about the kind of support their relationship needs. “When people come on the app, they can answer quizzes and questions, which is all private to them, but we use that data and anonymize it,” Ankit said. It all makes Flamme smarter– and more helpful.
Ankit said the team is always working to ensure couples get the best experience possible from Flamme. They’re focusing on keeping users on the app and making sure it stays helpful, even as couples use it for long periods of time.
“Last year we received a testimonial from a woman that really moved us,” Ankit said. “She told us she met her partner in a mental health facility, and they were struggling with mental health. They loved each other, but were worried about navigating their relationship and were struggling.”
Ankit said this couple was unable to access coaching or counseling and was left unsatisfied by the advice they received online, which was plentiful but not always high-quality. They tried Flamme on a whim and were surprised with the results.
“They started using it every day, discovering each other and themselves,” Ankit said. “The woman told us she felt like she was learning about herself every day, and trusted herself more. And for us, that’s the biggest win– really helping people.”
