In a diverse nation such as the U.S., regional cultures and traditions shape the behaviors and etiquette of residents. Among the many facets of American life, the manners of its men offer a fascinating glimpse into the heart of each state. 

From the Southern charm that is a hallmark of states like Georgia and Alabama to the understated politeness of Midwestern states such as Minnesota and Iowa, well-mannered men across America reflect the unique values and customs of their home regions.

The Most Chivalrous City in Each State

To gain a deeper understanding of where the most well-mannered men reside, we conducted a comprehensive survey of 3,000 singles from across the country. Our aim was to pinpoint the cities where they encountered the best-mannered men. 

The table below shows the top city in each state:

List of the top well-mannered cities per state

Additional findings from the survey showed that a whopping 36% of women surveyed said they frequently encounter rude behavior on dates.

Over 1 in 3 women encounter rude behavior from dates.

When it comes to chivalry, it seems old-fashioned manners are still in vogue. More than half of the respondents (56%) said they believe chivalry is very important in a potential partner.

Over half of singles believe chivalry is very important.

So, what makes a man truly mannered in the eyes of women? The survey results are telling. Politeness and respect are tied with patience and understanding, each snagging 31% of the vote. Thoughtfulness and consideration came in next at 19%. Good communication skills, while important, were highlighted by just 15%, and humility and modesty rounded out the list at just over 4%.

Graph of the personality traits of a well-mannered man.

Our survey also revealed that women find engaging in respectful and meaningful conversations (43%) and planning thoughtful and creative dates (18%) to be the most charming behaviors on a date. Genuine compliments (14%), punctuality, consideration of time (12%), and opening doors (12%) also make a positive impression.

Respectful conversations are considered charming date behavior.

On the opposite end of the scale, poor communication or lack of responsiveness tops the list of women’s pet peeves on dating apps, with 31% of respondents highlighting this issue. Being overly aggressive or pushy (22%) and sending inappropriate messages or pictures (20%) are also major turn-offs, followed by a lack of effort in planning dates (16%) and dishonesty or insincerity (12%).

31% of women say poor communication is a pet peeve.

“Chivalry may seem like an old-fashioned notion, but it can still come into play in the dating world,” said Amber Brooks, Editor-in-Chief at DatingNews. “Respect, courtesy, and honesty are certainly desirable traits in a partner, and that will continue to be the case for single people across the board.”

Methodology 

We conducted an online panel survey of 3,000 singles based on age, gender, and geography in July 2024. Internal data sources were used to obtain population data sets. We used a two-step process to ensure representativeness through stratified sampling and post-stratification weighting.