No matter how careful you try to be, starting a new relationship requires trust. Love is inherently vulnerable. Despite your best efforts, you can never perfectly vet the people you let into your life and into your heart. Unfortunately, trust and vulnerability can sometimes have devastating consequences.
One of those consequences is falling prey to a romance scam. This type of scam involves a fraudster posing as a romantic interest and forming an online relationship with someone with the intent of getting money from them.
Con men have always taken advantage of those with a heart and a wallet, but online dating has made it possible for romance scams to bloom into an international industry. And, as the stats show, anyone can be a target.
Many people gravely misunderstand romance scams and become victims of that ignorance. Keep reading to learn more about the reality of romance scams and how to protect yourself.
1. Romance Scams Reached $1.14 Billion in Losses in 2023
As of 2023, romance scams reached $1.14 billion in U.S. losses, according to the FTC1. As scammers hone their skills, we expect that number to climb higher in the years to come.
A romance scam involves a fraudster posing as a romantic interest and asking for money.
Like other types of financial crimes, romance scams are usually not one-off incidents of greed, but part of calculated criminal businesses with many scammers working in a network. This level of organization means that scams are tricky to spot and can result in huge losses for victims.
2. The U.S. Sees 64,000 Romance Scams Reported Per Year
Tens of thousands of people are falling prey to romance scams. The same 2024 FTC report found that in 2023, there were 64,003 incidents of romance scams in the U.S2.
That’s the number reported. The actual number of victims is going to be higher because many people fail to report what happened to them out of shame or despair.
Government scams and business scams outpace romance scams in reported numbers. But the psychological cost of romance scams is much higher than other types of scams, even if there are relatively fewer victims.
3. Over Half of Victims Never Report Romance Scams
Different researchers report different figures, but according to AARP, 55% of romance scam victims never report what happened to them3.
There are plenty of reasons victims don’t come forward. Most feel shame around falling for a scam. Others know that it would be virtually impossible to get their money back anyway. Sometimes it’s just easier to swallow the loss and keep that embarrassing story to yourself.
If you’re avoiding coming forward out of shame, I want to emphasize that romance scams can truly happen to anyone. Victimization says nothing about your intelligence, and getting help can potentially save your money or help the next person from suffering the same fate.
4. About 2 in 3 Social Media Users Have Been Scammed
The internet has been rife with scammers since its earliest days. Today, social media is a big entry point for scammers to reach out with a fake profile and find a victim. About 63% of social media users report being scammed at least once4.
Victims often let their guards down on social media. If they see that they have mutual friends in common with someone, they may assume that person is vetted by people they know. But it’s pretty easy to create a believable social media profile, especially with the advent of AI.
5. The Median Loss for Romance Scam Victims Is $2,000
Of the types of scams the FTC tracks, romance scams took the highest per capita median toll, at $2,000 in losses per victim5.
This is unsurprising to me. Romance scams lead the victim to feel a personal connection and believe in a shared financial future. They may think they’re paying for their boyfriend to get medical treatment or their fiancé to move to their country, so of course they’re willing to spend more.
Additionally, many people experience a sunk cost mentality6, even after they start having misgivings. They keep spending out of fear that acknowledging their suspicions will upset their partner or make the deception true.
6. A Shocking 16% of Adults Know Someone Who’s Lost Money to a Romance Scam
Romance scams touch all of us. According to AARP, 16% of adults either know someone who’s been the victim of a romance scam or have been victims themselves7.
Many victims feel a sense of shame over their losses. They often think, “I should have known better.” But talking about your experience helps those around you know to be on the lookout for scams and to know they aren’t alone.
7. About 1 in 5 Victims Are in the 55-64 Age Group
Romance scams can come for any age group, but one gets hit more often than others: Those between ages 55 and 64. According to Lloyds Banking Group, 20% of romance scam victims are in this age group8.
55-64 years old
Scammers may assume that this group of daters has less technological literacy than those younger than them. They’re also more active daters than those older than them. That makes this group of younger seniors prime targets for romance scammers.
8. Of Adults Over 50, 45% Feel Uninformed About Scam Tactics
Most people don’t stay up to date on scammer trends. Approximately 45% of adults over 50 feel uninformed about common scam tactics9, and more still are probably uninformed without realizing it.
It’s impossible to keep yourself completely safe from scams. But reading about warning signs and common tactics can help you improve your instincts and spot suspicious behavior.
9. Sadly, 2 in 3 Say Romance Scam Victims Are "Naive"
Romance scams can happen to anyone, but unfortunately, most people don’t realize that. About 60% of people believe that romance scam victims are too trusting10. They assume that they’d never fall for a scam. But the truth is that scams can be elaborate and extremely difficult to detect until it’s too late.
Scammers build trust with their victims over long periods of time, sometimes sending thousands of messages before asking for money. Victims feel deep connections with their scammers. It’s not a matter of being overly trusting. It’s a matter of falling for the wrong person.
10. Between 2017 and 2021, Romance Scams Became 10X More Common for People Ages 18-29
Romance scams are becoming more common amongst younger victims, too. Between 2017 and 2021, the FTC reported that romance scams increased tenfold among victims aged 18-2911.
This age group sees fewer scams and lower losses than older adults with more money. But the increased popularity of victimizing this age group suggests that scams have gotten even harder to detect, even among young adults with high technological literacy.
11. Romance Scams Account for $139 Million in Crypto Losses
In the last few years, one facet of romance scams has absolutely skyrocketed: The use of cryptocurrency in romance scams.
As of 2021, the FTC reported that $139 million of romance scam losses were in cryptocurrency, up five times from 2020. Safe to assume that number has only gone up since12.
Many scammers have their victims send money through cryptocurrency, either to be “managed” for the victim by the scammer or directly as a loan. These crypto exchanges are essentially untraceable, making it all the more difficult for the victim to get their money back.
12. About 1 in 4 Victims Paid the Scammer With a Gift Card
A gift card is another untraceable form of money that scammers favor. As many as one in four romance scam victims pays in gift cards, according to the FTC13.
The one bright side of gift card losses is that the amount lost is usually lower. We’re talking $50 instead of $10,000. But still, if someone asks you to pay them or loan them money in gift cards, be extremely wary.
13. At $9,000, Singles Over 70 Reported the Highest Losses
Seniors in their 50s and 60s might be most likely to be victims of romance scams, but those over 70 reported the highest losses. The FTC reported that those over 70 had a median loss of $9,000, the highest of any age group14.
Scammers reasonably assume that the older a victim is, the more disposable income they likely have. Those deep into retirement often have immediate access to large amounts of money. Some older victims lose hundreds of thousands of dollars15. That’s their life savings that they rely on for their golden years.
14. California Recorded 6,742 Romance Scams in a Single Year
The most populous state has the highest number of romance scams, with 6,742 cases in 202316. California is both highly populated and wealthy relative to many other states, making it a prime target for romance scammers.
And its temperate climate makes California – along with the #2 top romance scam state, Florida – home to many seniors, who are especially susceptible to romance scams.
15. The Gender Breakdown of Victims Is About Equal, at 53% Men and 47% Women
People can be victimized at any age and regardless of gender. Men and women fall for romance scams at about equal rates.
According to Statista, 53% of romance scam victims are men and 47% are women17. Men are slightly more susceptible to losing money to a scammer, perhaps because of their stereotypical role as provider in the dating realm; they're more open to being asked for money.
Men are also more likely to use dating sites in the first place18, so that could account for the 6% increase in victimhood. But it's still not a huge gender gap.
The desire for companionship and love is universal. Both men and women want to trust their romantic partners, which is all it takes to be victimized by a romance scam. No one is fully safe.
16. Active Duty Service Members Have Reported 1,751 Romance Scams Since 2020
It’s especially common for scammers to pose as members of the military. They use this excuse to explain why they can’t meet in person, why they go radio silent, and most of all, why they’re so secretive.
But scammers also target members of the military, sometimes using that same cover to connect over all they have in common.
MOAA reported that as many as 1,751 instances of romance scams have targeted active duty members of the military since 202019. This is just the number reported. Much like with civilian cases, the real number is likely much higher.
17. Romance Scams Have Risen 20% Year-Over-Year
Romance scams have dramatically increased since the start of online dating, but they’re still on the rise. Barclays reported that in the first quarter of 2025, they rose 20% year-over-year20.
I suspect the rise of AI is behind this sharp increase. AI has made it far easier for scammers to write and send many messages quickly. Even worse, they can create more convincing profiles, imagery, and even voice messages.
Even tech-savvy daters have a hard time differentiating what’s AI and what’s not. Asking to video call your dates can help weed out some scammers, but still, nothing is perfect.
18. About 1 in 3 Scam Victims Quit the Apps
A Barclay Scams survey discovered that the impact of romance scams could spell trouble for the online dating industry. About 37% of victims quit using dating apps after falling for a scammer21.
This is an understandable but unfortunate reaction to being victimized. It only creates more isolation, loneliness, and vulnerability.
Know the Signs and Protect Yourself
There’s no one-size-fits-all model for protecting yourself from romance scams, other than swearing off love completely. For most of us, the hope of finding your person is worth taking some risk.
Still, there are precautions you can take to give yourself the best chance of financial and emotional safety.
- Video call as soon as possible. When you start messaging someone, this is a good way to check if they’re willing to show their face and if they line up with their photos.
- Keep messaging on the app. Dating apps offer more protection from scams, but once you take the connection to an alternative provider, you lose their protection.
- Never send money to an online connection. Frankly, if they’re asking you for money, it’s a red flag.
If you find yourself the victim of a romance scam, know you’re not alone. This can happen to anyone, and it’s always a good choice to ask for help.
- https://www.ftc.gov/business-guidance/blog/2024/02/love-stinks-when-scammer-involved ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/business-guidance/blog/2024/02/love-stinks-when-scammer-involved ↩︎
- https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/social-leisure/relationships/romance-scams-survey/ ↩︎
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7254823/ ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/business-guidance/blog/2024/02/love-stinks-when-scammer-involved ↩︎
- https://adamlevin.com/2023/06/12/the-sunk-cost-fallacy-of-romance-scams/ ↩︎
- https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/social-leisure/relationships/romance-scams-survey/ ↩︎
- https://www.lloydsbankinggroup.com/media/press-releases/2025/lloyds-bank-2025/lloyds-warns-rise-in-romance-scams.html ↩︎
- https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/social-leisure/relationships/romance-scams-survey/ ↩︎
- https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/social-leisure/relationships/romance-scams-survey/ ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spotlight/2022/02/reports-romance-scams-hit-record-highs-2021 ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spotlight/2022/02/reports-romance-scams-hit-record-highs-2021 ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spotlight/2022/02/reports-romance-scams-hit-record-highs-2021 ↩︎
- https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spotlight/2022/02/reports-romance-scams-hit-record-highs-2021 ↩︎
- https://www.sbsun.com/2026/07/18/76-year-old-perfect-victim-loses-hundreds-of-thousands-of-dollars-riverside-home-to-romance-scam/ ↩︎
- https://www.statista.com/statistics/1389185/us-romance-scam-numbers-by-state/ ↩︎
- https://www.statista.com/statistics/1481218/us-online-dating-service-users-scams-by-gender/ ↩︎
- https://time.com/3711902/men-use-dating-apps-more-tinder/ ↩︎
- https://www.moaa.org/content/publications-and-media/news-articles/2025-news-articles/recommended-reads/true-love,-or-total-fraud-how-romance-scams-lure-troops,-vets,-and-survivors/ ↩︎
- https://home.barclays/news/press-releases/2025/04/barclays-scams-bulletin--romance-scam-reports-rise-20-per-cent-a/ ↩︎
- https://www.datingnews.com/industry-trends/new-report-users-want-dating-platforms-to-strengthen-scam-prevention/ ↩︎
