In a diverse country like the U.S., regional cultures and traditions help shape how people behave and treat one another. Among the many parts of American life, the manners of its men offer an interesting window into the character of each state.

From the Southern charm that is a hallmark of states like Georgia and Alabama to the understated politeness of Midwestern states such as Minnesota and Iowa, well-mannered men across America reflect the unique values and customs of their home regions.

The Most Chivalrous City in Each State

To better understand where the most well-mannered men live, we surveyed 3,000 singles from across the country. We wanted to identify the cities where they said they met the most courteous men.

The table below shows the top city in each state:

Additional findings from the survey showed that a whopping 36% of women surveyed said they frequently encounter rude behavior on dates.

When it comes to chivalry, classic good manners still matter. In fact, more than half of respondents (56%) said chivalry is very important when they’re considering a potential partner.

So, what makes a man truly mannered in the eyes of women? The survey results are telling. Politeness and respect are tied with patience and understanding, each snagging 31% of the vote. Thoughtfulness and consideration came in next at 19%. Good communication skills, while important, were highlighted by just 15%, and humility and modesty rounded out the list at just over 4%.

Our survey found that women are most charmed by respectful, meaningful conversation (43%) and by dates that feel thoughtful and original (18%). Sincere compliments (14%), being on time and mindful of schedules (12%), and opening doors (12%) also leave a strong impression.

On the opposite end of the scale, poor communication or lack of responsiveness tops the list of women’s pet peeves on dating apps, with 31% of respondents highlighting this issue. Being overly aggressive or pushy (22%) and sending inappropriate messages or pictures (20%) are also major turn-offs, followed by a lack of effort in planning dates (16%) and dishonesty or insincerity (12%).

“Chivalry may seem like an old-fashioned notion, but it can still come into play in the dating world,” said Amber Brooks, Editor-in-Chief at DatingNews. “Respect, courtesy, and honesty are certainly desirable traits in a partner, and that will continue to be the case for single people across the board.”

Methodology 

We conducted an online panel survey of 3,000 singles based on age, gender, and geography in July 2024. Internal data sources were used to obtain population data sets. We used a two-step process to ensure representativeness through stratified sampling and post-stratification weighting.