Are Political Differences a Dealbreaker? Gen Z Women Say “Yes”

“Where did you grow up?” “Do you have any siblings?” “What do you do for work?” Of all the questions we ask on a first date, one question is becoming considerably easier to answer with every passing election cycle: “Are political differences a dealbreaker for you?”

For most Gen Z women, the answer is yes.

The dating app Coffee Meets Bagel surveyed almost 1,400 of its users in August 2024 about how politics shapes their dating lives. Of the women surveyed by Coffee Meets Bagel, 37% said they wouldn’t date someone with different political beliefs. This number is slashed in half for the men who were surveyed, with only 15% considering political differences to be a dealbreaker.

Overall, 83% of surveyed daters said they would consider ending a relationship over political differences. Another telling statistic: Sixty-nine percent said they would use a dating app feature that allows the user to filter matches by political party.

Clearly, aligned political views matter more than ever to Gen Z daters.

“The importance women place on political compatibility shows up again and again throughout our data,” Coffee Meets Bagel said. “Overall, this shows that women are more inclined to be transparent about what they’re looking for and think it’s important to discuss these topics early on.”

But those stats from Coffee Meets Bagel were recorded before the 2024 presidential election. By 2025, 43% of millennial and Gen Z women surveyed by the dating app Hily said they wouldn’t date someone who voted differently from them in the 2024 presidential election. Again, fewer men — 21% — felt the same way.

When Coffee Meets Bagel asked users to name their specific political dealbreakers, the results shed light on which political issues daters of all ages are most passionate about. Thirty-one percent of those surveyed by Coffee Meets Bagel said that women’s reproductive rights is a dealbreaker issue. Meanwhile, 18% said racial equality is a dealbreaker, and 9% said the same about LGBTQ+ rights.

Core values looked a little different to older generations. Economic policy matters more to Gen X and millennials than it does to Gen Z, according to the Coffee Meets Bagel survey. Each generation prioritizes a single issue more than the others: Gen X values healthcare, while Gen Z values LGBTQ+ rights. Overall, reproductive rights and racial equality are important issues to Coffee Meets Bagel users of each generation.

Democrats and Republicans can’t seem to agree on much, including whether or not they want to date each other: Eighty-nine percent of self-described left-leaning Coffee Meets Bagel users reported that political alignment is “somewhat important” to a healthy relationship. Only 68% of self-described right-leaning Coffee Meets Bagel users agreed with their left-leaning counterparts.

Political Issues and Core Values are Closely Linked

All these statistics beg a serious question: Why do young people put so much stock in political alignment? Aside from the obvious — that political issues have always resonated with those they directly affect — social media and the internet have also played vital roles. It’s no wonder young people want to see their political views reflected on dating apps. “Political debates are unavoidable in modern times,” said Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, April Eldemire, for Psychology Today. “The political climate has infiltrated our most intimate spaces, turning what once were simple disagreements into battlegrounds.”

These “simple disagreements” have turned into all-out battles because they’re often rooted in core values. As Eldemire said, these core values become relationship dealbreakers, which in turn “etch their way into many facets of everyday life.”

Politics have grown to represent much more than government. Nowadays, human rights and decency are inextricably linked to politics. The safety of millions of Americans — particularly those who weren’t factored into the political equation just a few decades ago, such as people of color and people who identify as transgender — largely lies in the hands of politicians. With so much at stake, it makes sense why today’s daters give politics so much power. It doesn’t only affect their love lives, but every part of their lives.

It’s commonplace for people on Tinder, Hinge, and other dating apps to list their political opinions. “As dating app and dating site usage has increased dramatically over the past decade, users have been given unprecedented discretion to select the characteristics they desire in a prospective romantic partner,” the American Survey Center pointed out in its 2020 American Perspectives Survey. By listing specific preferences on their profiles, people can avoid matching with — and accidentally dating — someone who doesn’t share their core values.

Some dating apps were created for the sole purpose of bringing politically-aligned love-seekers together, such as The Right Stuff and Lefty. This lessens the chance of people matching only to discover they have different political — and therefore ideological — beliefs. It saves daters precious time, and even prevents heartbreak.

When all is said and done, only 17% of those surveyed by Coffee Meets Bagel said they have ever ended a relationship because of political differences. But don’t be fooled: It’s not that cross-political couples always manage to overlook their differences. It’s more likely that cross-political couples simply don’t date at all.

A majority of Gen Z women may not find themselves married to someone of opposing viewpoints, but the same can’t be said for older generations. What do you do if the person you’re married to reveals political beliefs that you can’t support? What if they become enmeshed in right- or left-wing conspiracy theories, and become someone you no longer recognize? These scenarios are not far-fetched in today’s modern world.

Eldemire emphasized how political differences in marriages can lead to problems with communication and decision-making, as well as overall emotional strain. Any relationship app that facilitates productive conversations may be appealing to couples who are dealing with these issues. It’s possible that relationship apps centered on bridging the gap between couples with political — and therefore ideological — differences may be the future.

There are very few star-crossed lovers in politics. Young Democrats and Republicans would rather stick to their chosen side of the aisle, where their political views are supported and shared, than to venture into potentially unfriendly territory.